Chapter 28: Hard work pays off! [my husband's promotion day]

While my husband escorted me off the ship...

My husband: "Hey man, have you met my wife before?"

His friend: "Yeah, I met her at your thing! Hello."

Me: "Hey, nice to see you again!"

[we walk away]

Me: "Which thing is he talking about? Your reenlistment ceremony or promotion ceremony?"

My husband: "My... oh, both. You were at both!"
Me: "Yes, I was!"

:) You should've seen the smile on his face. I've missed so many special moments in his career before we got married/before I moved here. I'm glad I can now be here for all these moments! After visiting my husband on duty today, I realized that I had yet to blog about his promotion ceremony on May 31st!

The day started off with me waking up early to make him turken & waffles for his special day :) Then we had a pretty funny conversation while driving to base:

Me: "I think we should start eating avocados"
My husband: "Avocados? Why should we start eating them?"
Me: "Because they've got a lot of good stuff in them."
My husband: "What kind of good stuff?"
Me: "All kinds of good stuff!"
My husband: "All kinds of good stuff?!!! Well, I can't argue with that!"

LOL  This caused quite the outburst of laughter for us! Haha. I love our conversations. We understand each other. Lol 

After I dropped him off to the ship, I drove back home to get ready & waited until I needed to head back for the ceremony. It was really nice seeing all of these sailors looking sharp & standing at attention—my handsome husband, especially :) It was a really hot day & I'm pretty sure I got a tan! I wouldn't have missed this ceremony for the world, though!

When my husband finally got off work, we spent the day enjoying our time together. Our way of celebrating was: choosing to walk over 2 miles to the store & back instead of driving, experiencing a stray cat run up to us from across the parking lot [making me think we were going to get attacked] just to rub up on us like she knew us, sitting in empty garages, & cooking steak for my husband [since I don't eat beef] for dinner using a family recipe. It was a good day! Smoothies, Redbox, & major cuddle time :)

He took the advancement/promotion test in March & the results didn't come until May. He is now a Petty Officer 2nd Class! It's crazy to think that just 4 weeks ago before his promotion ceremony was his reenlistment ceremony! May was a very special month & I'm a very proud Navy Wife! ♥

Chapter 27: "They love me, they love me not" [marriage woes]

We're all familiar with that image of some young kid picking off a flower's petals one by one trying to figure out if their crush 'loves them' or 'loves them not' & make believing as if the last petal you land on will reveal the truth. Even when we get older we still do this to some degree—minus the flower, that is. We do this whether we're dating, in a serious relationship, or already married. A big fight [or build up of many little fights] no matter how silly or serious the issue, can cause us to question how we feel about our significant other or how they feel about us. "They love me, they love me not". We're human & often ruled by our emotions—especially those knee-jerk emotions.

What's more important?
Being 'right' in a fight OR having a strong marriage/relationship?
--> If you did wrong, you can make it worse by not apologizing right away, not asking how to make it right, not truly promising to change [depending on the circumstance], & only defending yourself.
--> If you were wronged, you can make it worse by lashing out & not giving your significant other a chance to speak & apologize.

Easier said than done, right?! Of course. Then again, who said it would be easy?

My husband & I once got the chance to help a couple who were having a hard time.
I won't go into detail about it, but it was definitely a new experience for us. Sure, I've helped out a girl friend with her marital or relationship problems before & he's helped out a guy friend with marital or relationship problems before, but we have never helped out a couple together.

A few days after we had stepped in, I received a message from one of them thanking us for what we did. I decided to give them some final two cents of marriage advice & I've decided to share it here in hopes that it might by chance help someone else who may be struggling in their marriage or relationship. This was my message to them:

"We're just glad we could help. Every married couple has issues. Every newlywed couple & even couples who have been together for years are still constantly learning. You learn how to be the best husband or wife with time. Marriage can be difficult & no one really understands just how difficult it can be until they're married & faced with their own trials. Marriage means still choosing to love each other even when it seems difficult to. Marriage takes a lot of hard work, but as long as both people are truly willing to work on their marriage every day [even when things are good], then they'll reap the benefits for a lifetime—enjoying a long & happy marriage. We hope you two are doing well."

How do you not just survive marriage but thrive in your marriage?!

There's a lot of good advice out there & different things work for different people, but none of the advice will work if both people don't put in the effort needed.

• It's important to be on the same page.
• It's important to keep that passion & love for each other alive in whatever way works best, because every couple is different.
• It's also very important to surround yourselves with people who will help lift you up when things get rough.

You need people that will say, "you two will work it out" not people that will say, "well that sucks, just get a divorce." Having a loving family & good friends [especially ones that are married] who encourage you & your marriage is essential. I'm glad we had the opportunity to be friends to this couple. It's sort of like a 'pay it forward' for the friends & family that have helped us in the past. We're very blessed to have the friends & family that we have, because we know they'll continue to be there for us in the future if we ever need them.

If you see someone struggling, lend them a hand. Someday you may need someone to lend you a hand. Always love ♥

Photo credit: http://tctechcrunch2011.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/daisy.jpg?w=300

Chapter 26: A Long Distance Father's Day [+video]

There are so many places I wish I could be right now... in California with my dad for Father's Day, in Seattle for my twin cousins' college graduation, on the ship with my husband since he's on duty today, & somewhere in another country [then again, I always want to travel, so that's nothing new].

Today made me think of the special Father-Daughter dance I got to share with my dad at my wedding [7.7.12] & whenever I watch it I get a little teary eyed all over again. With that said, below is the 3 minute video clip of our Father-Daughter dance.

My favorite parts to watch are time frames:

• 01:00-01:22 [My dad was making me laugh by dancing goofy with me. I love how he poses for the camera at the very end!]
• 01:47-02:36 [I was crying & blubbering like a whale! You can tell my dad was crying too, but I'm sure he'll tell you that he just got dust in his eye or something ;) Lol]
                      

I think Father-Daughter dances at weddings are so special, because how often do grown women really get the chance to dance with their dad? The last time I recall dancing with my dad before my wedding was as a little girl. I'm grateful to have had a Father-Daughter dance because I know not everyone gets to have one due to not being able to have a big wedding, their father passing away, never knowing their father, or not having a good relationship with their father.

A friend of mine posted something really personal & touching story on her Facebook today in regards to Father's Day & she gave me permission to share it with others. I think it's beautifully written & has such a wonderful message.

None of us are Fatherless. By Jennifer Song

In 2nd grade our class had to do a project where we made Father’s Day cards for our.. well, fathers. I remember making one mindlessly. I never really thought too much of it when I was younger. When you don’t grow up with a dad, you don’t exactly know what you’re missing. I knew mine was in Korea. I didn’t have a relationship with him - we didn’t speak on a regular basis, but he was there somewhere across the world.

As I was making this Father’s Day card, one of my classmates tried to stop me.

“You don’t have a dad.”

“Yes, I do.”

“Don’t lie.”

“I DO. I’m gonna send it to him!”

I remember being very upset and the next thing I knew, I was home and threw away the card into the green trash bin in the kitchen of our tiny apartment where all the rubbish went.

I lied to this classmate. I wasn’t ever going to send it, but I knew I had a dad but they just did not understand.

I didn’t quite understand either. I didn’t understand why things were the way they were and why.

This was 16 years ago.

If I could talk to my 8 year old self, I would tell her that she always had a father.. and even better than just a biological father, that she had a Heavenly Father who loves her and would do anything for her and never leave her.

I would also tell her that 16 years from now she would face the very dad that seemed extremely negligent and that she would be able to forgive him and learn to love him in her own unique way because her Heavenly Father did first.

God was the Father I always had but was hard to grasp. Even still now He is hard to grasp, but the way He’s led me so far in this life of mine fills my heart with an overwhelming amount of disbelief and peace. He’s gotten me this far despite the odds against me and He’s been chipping away at the nonsense and molding me to be who He ultimately wants me to be.

I would also tell her that she was right about believing that one day she would have a loving husband who would one day be a great father to her own children. I will let her know that she would be able to trust that marriage is something possible for her regardless of all the failed relationships and failed marriages she was surrounded by because she wouldn’t base all her trust & hopes in humans, but in her Lord.

I know that some of you may not have a relationship with your dad as much as you wish you did, or have had the chance to ever get to know them - but the most important thing is to know that none of us are fatherless.

Happy Father's Day

In closing...

My Dad is a friend to everyone he meets. He would laugh during the 'scary' parts of movies so that I wouldn't get too scared when I was a kid [he becomes a comedian]. He always takes time out of his busy day to help his daughters in any way he can—whether it be a car problem [he becomes a mechanic], helping find something that we misplaced in the house [he becomes a detective] or fixing up something for us to eat whenever we got hungry [he becomes a chef], etc..

That's my dad. && I'm blessed to have him. Sending a daughters love from the East Coast to the West Coast! Wish I could be there to celebrate with you. Happy Fathers Day, from your daughter & son-in-law! 

I also have to send love & father's day wishes to: my father-in-law, my grandpas/grandpa in-laws, my Uncles who are fathers, & EVERY father & father-to-be! Your love is needed in this world ♥

What is one special memory you have with your dad?! Share it with him today because I'm sure he'd love to hear it & feel free to share it in a comment below!